Gm football fans.

Route One here, the football newsletter that bursts with more flavour than a pack of Fruit Pastilles.

Today’s briefing is a ~7 min read:

• Saudi money could be making its way to North London… 🐓

• Story Time: The (Short) Story Of Ali Dia And The Greatest Con In Premier League History 📖

• Extra Time: is Messi favourite for the Ballon d’Or? 🤔

🗞️ Morning Brief

SPURS SHEIKH-DOWN… 💰

There’s one thing we know about Daniel Levy: he loves the sweet taste of moolah.

Cash. Bucks. Coins. Dough. Dollar. Green. Legal Tender.

These are just a few of Levy’s favourite things.

And when PSG’s President met Levy to discuss investing in Spurs earlier this year, he was feeling good.

But things have just heated up…

Following Sheikh Jassim’s failed Man Utd bid, Spurs are next on his radar.

1/ Who are all these people from Qatar?

• PSG President - Nasser for short, is the Qatari Investment Authority (QIA) director and chair of Qatari Sport Authority (QSA).

• Sheikh Jassim is the Chair of the Qatari Islamic Bank (QIB) - he is a banker.

• Sheikh Jassim’s dad used to be Prime Minister and chair of the QIA.

2/ How are they related?

• QIA (PSG President’s company) is the largest shareholder of QIB (Manu Utd and Tottenham hopeful’s company) - 17.7%.

• It’s been hinted that PSG’s President and Sheikh Jassim are distant cousins.

3/ How are they rich?

• Oil 🛢️

4/ Is buying Spurs a good idea?

Well, there are quite a few benefits…

• Big fan base

• Great history

• The best facilities and stadium in the world

• Near the Route One HQ ;)

• Financially healthy

But, there’s one major drawback… negotiating with Daniel Levy.

Despite all their resources, negotiating with the money-loving and notoriously tough negotiator Levy will be no easy feat for the Qataris.

Interactions with the Glazers will feel like a brisk walk in the park or a fun game of frisbee compared to negotiating with Levy.

We wish the Qataris the best of luck with this one.

EXTRA-TIME ⏱️

Messi had a goal contribution every 69 minutes during 2022. Seems incredible? That was his eighth-best season in terms of goal contribution per 90. Coincidently, Messi is the favourite to win his eighth Ballon d'Or.

Mbappe takes his mind off the Ballon d’Or. Instead, he’s spending his time scoring worldies in training and celebrating in an appropriate fashion.

Steven Gerrard passing in the Champions League. Here’s a must-watch. Enjoy 1 minute and 23 seconds of Gerrard pinging the ball across the pitch. They don’t make ‘em like this any more.🏌️

Steve Cooper is short on glory. Don’t be so harsh on yourself, Stevie. Forest is 13th in the Prem - that’s enough glory in our eyes.

Cristiano Ronaldo has scored the MOST goals in 2023. He has now scored at least 40 goals in 12 different calendar years. 38-eight-years-young.

The (Short) Story Of Ali Dia And The Greatest Con In Premier League History 📖

At 31, Ali Dia fooled Southampton into his first appearance in the Premier League. He had never played a professional game before and he definitely wasn’t George Weah’s cousin.

Our story starts in 1996 when Graeme Souness managed Galatasaray.

After winning the Turkish Cup final, Souness grabbed his team’s flag and planted it in the centre of Fenerbahce’s home field.

Angry “moustached” men chased him down the tunnel and Souness was met with a clamp to the head by a home fan.

It was at that moment that Souness decided to return home and have another crack at managing in the Premier League. This time, at Southampton.

At the time of his arrival, Premier League clubs were receiving calls from a mystery man.

“I keep getting phone calls at the training ground from a guy called ‘Georgie Weah’,” West Ham manager Harry Redknapp recalls. “Lovely George, you wanna play for West Ham?”

“No, I have another player for you. My cousin, Ali Dia.”

“This is a wind-up.” Redknapp hangs up.

On the same day, Gillingham manager, Tony Pulis took the bait: “I was shocked to receive a call from someone claiming to be George Weah, recommending his cousin.”

“...we gave the lad a trial and he was rubbish.”

Dia failed to impress in his trials at Rotherham, Bournemouth and Gillingham. He decided to head south and try his luck with Southampton.

Things weren't going to plan for Souness. So when he received a call from 'George Weah' introducing his 'cousin', he thought his luck had changed.

“He has played with George Weah at Paris Saint-Germain. When someone like that gives you a recommendation you sit up and take notice,” Souness said.

Dia’s luck also began to take a turn. Despite scepticism about who this mystery man was, Dia impressed at his trials.

Southampton decided to take a punt and offered him a one-month trial.

Dia made his breakthrough into the squad against Leeds in November 1996. His moment came after 32 minutes when club-legend Matt Le Tissier came off injured.

While chasing a two-nil lead, Souness subbed on ‘George Weah’s’ cousin to change their fate.

“Graeme put him on and he was f**king hopeless,” remembers Le Tissier. “We were like: ‘What’s this geezer doing?"

The 31-year-old Senegalese played 53 minutes in the top flight and achieved a remarkable 100% shot accuracy.

They lost two goals to nil.

“He came in for treatment on Sunday morning. He was told to report again on Monday, and he did a runner.” Le Tissier concludes. 😂

MEME 😂